Rebbetzen Malka Miriam bat Mordechai z’l
Eulogy for Rebbetzen Miriam Plancey z”l
“Two flames, extinguished so closely together.”
So soon after we said goodbye to Moreinu v’Rabbeinu Rabbi Plancey z”l, we now find ourselves mourning his beloved wife, our Rebbetzen Miriam Plancey aleha hashalom.
The grief is heavy. The shock is still fresh. It feels too soon. Too sudden. Too much.
We can’t imagine how hard it is for the family.
And yet…perhaps it makes sense.
Because, just as we leyned on Shabbos, out of their deep respect and in the merit of her profound and unwavering loyalty, the Jewish people wouldn’t travel without Miriam. Rabbi Plancey couldn’t take his final journey without his beloved Miriam at his side either.
They didn’t even spend a Shabbat apart – he was the Melech (King) and she was his Malka (Queen).
They were inseparable in life, indivisible, true partners in every sense – and now they’re reunited in eternity.
Rebbetzen Plancey wasn’t simply a rebbetzen by title – she was the very definition of a Rebbetzen, the embodiment of all the qualities needed.
A true Eishet Chayil, עוז וְהָדָר לְבוּשָׁהּ – clothed in strength and dignity.
She didn’t seek honour, but honour pursued her.
She carried herself with quiet confidence, calm wisdom, and a deep sense of purpose.
And she was always there for others, selflessly for everyone else – her family, her friends, her community.
The phone was always busy, engaged in non-stop chessed calls – it will be no surprise if shares in BT drop this week!
She was a lifeline.
A listening ear, a caring word, sage advice for everyone – a kallah needing reassurance, a mother overwhelmed, someone in distress – she made time for each of them.
With patience. With insight. With love.
Like Miriam HaNeviah, she stood at the banks of the river – watching over, protecting, caring deeply.
She didn’t make speeches or demand attention, she didn’t need to, but she gave people the strength to carry on with constant nourishment for both body and soul.
The Jewish people were sustained for 40 years from the be’er of Miriam – the well of Miriam, and so were we.
Rebbetzen Miriam nourished us with care, with perspective, with warmth that ran deep.
And like the two Shabbos candles, representing Zachor and Shamor, she and Rabbi Plancey complemented each other perfectly.
She was his true Ezer Kenegdo and they were Basar Echad – sharing a common purpose.
He was the Zachor – the builder, the teacher, the community leader.
She was the Shamor – the quiet guardian, the inner compass, the homemaker.
Her home was a haven. Her phone line, a hotline. Her Shabbos table, a sanctuary.
And her presence – reassuring, real, and radiant – was a rare and precious gift to so many.
Now she takes her rightful place among the Nashim Tzidkaniyot – the righteous women of our people whose merit continues to sustain us.
And we are left with the image so perfectly captured in Mishlei:
עֹז וְהָדָר לְבוּשָׁה – during her lifetime she was clothed in strength and dignity, and that’s why now וַתִּשְׂחַק לְיוֹם אַחֲרוֹן – she can laugh at the days to come.
She has nothing to fear.
Because she’s given her dear family, and her beloved community, everything that they and we need.
She taught us how to live. How to give. How to love with intention and lead with humility.
And so, as we say farewell, we say: Thank you.
Thank you, Rebbetzen, for everything you did for your family, for your kehilla, for Klal Yisrael.
We thank you for every conversation, every act of kindness, every moment you gave when no-one else but you knew we needed it.
And we ask for mechila – forgiveness. For anything we may have done or failed to do in return.
You gave so much to so many, and we can never truly repay you.
But we hope our lives will reflect what we learned from yours – a world built on chessed.
We daven that you should be a meilitza yosher – an advocate on high for your dear family, a spiritual intercessor for your beloved community, and a heavenly agent for Klal Yisrael.
At this time, we need your zechut more than ever.
Yehi zichrah baruch.
May the neshamah of Rebbetzen Malka Miriam bat Mordechai have the highest aliyah in shomayim, reunited with her beloved husband.
And may their shared legacy continue to shine through their children Susy, Nechama, Meir and Nussi, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and all who walk the path they helped illuminate.